what in the hell is wrong with men

Call it what you want, but I simply need to slow down with men and THAT MEANS, yes, brace yourself, cause I know what I'm about to say may be shocking to most, but my plan/goal is to really get to know the next man BEFORE getting physical.

What does that even mean? Well it means, simply, that no man will see my naked body unless they

a. can name my favorite movie
b. list the 8 bordering countries to turkey
c. describe all the members of my immediate family
d. agree to get a brand new set of all STD tests and actually show me the report
e. laugh in the right places
f. meet my selected special group of friends
g. prove that they are not completely and utterly normal in the regular sense of the word


YES. i KNOW this may seem abnormal to most of you. but you must at least pretend to understand that I simply refuse to go through all the bullshit again. YEs, sex is just wonderful to get but it aint worth the hellish pain that I have been through. and I know I'm being vague but frankly, that aint none of your bizness.

But on a more serious note: what is SOOO important about rushing into meeting someone. do we all think the clock is ticking? are we in SUCH a hurry to "seal the deal" because we think its our only chance? Honestly, there are sooooo many ways and means with which to seal the deal out there and especially in nyc. So why oh why are we in such a hurry.

I'm totally built in a different way. I think sometimes I must be living in the wrong time period.

Sometimes when I'm bored at work I walk around and talk to (or annoy) all my coworkers. Theres one in particular who is always good for bullshitting. And the other day I'm looking over his shoulder at his "buddy" list scrutinizing everyone on it. I come to this one guy, lets call him sheepshead, and i ask all about him. he's my age exactly and so ok, i grab my coworkers keyboard and start typing to him as if. 95% out of boredom and 5% out of curiosity.

nothing. so then, and admittedly stupid, i add him to MY OWN buddy list. he see this a few days later and late on the following saturday he writes me. i tell him straight up who i am, that i was bored and thats why i added him, that im NOT looking to date anyone but im happy to chat with him, etc etc.

so we continue chatting and getting to know eachother (which incidentally was my plan in effect) and then he starts up with all this sex talk and i realize almost immediately he's a big ass and i would never date him even if i wanted to. but since i made that clear i kept chatting but not at all indulging him in his crap. i kept it clean. anyway, he wanted a photo

no

he wanted me to call him,

no

then he went on and on about how im playing games and i am hiding behind some fear, etc etc. and now he refuses to speak to me. he says the only way he will communicate is if i call. lol.

that is, mind you, after less than 24 HOURS of even knowing him. he's ready to call and meet and sex. and im not even gonnna get into the fact that he's an out of work illegal alien because I was stopped at personality alone. And so my boredom and thirst for human contact has once again led me astray.

the same thing happened when my life fell apart and i was in a online support group looking for some help. i happened to speak to a guy who lives in this city with a similar problem and he has ceased all communication with me simply because I refused to meet him. It was a support group, not a fucking dating group. i needed someone to talk to, i thought this was clear but anyway, you see my frustration.

hopefully, or maybe you TOO think im playing some game? do you? Well I'm hardfast with this new set of rules. I really cannot go through bullshit again. and i aint talking just about a broken heart here, im talking about hard core physical pain. So if a guy isn't willing to go at my speed then why bother.

that is exactly how i feel. no games
no bullshit
just the way it is